Here are some Loko Stories:
So one night I went on a booze cruise around lower Manhattan with some friends. It was an open bar so we were all completely hammered. On the way back to my town we decided to get some 4lokos and go out to a bar for a few more drinks. I remember starting my second 4loko and then I woke up to a beeping noise. I opened my eyes and saw myself hooked up to all these heart monitors with two IV’s in my arms. I immediately freaked out and tore everything off of me. The nurses came running in screaming so I screamed back at them demanding to know what had happened. They said I had already told them when I was brought in on a stretcher:
They told me, that what I told them had happened was I got drunk, lost my friends, and phone died. I left the bar, walked to my car, and decided I was too drunk to drive home so decided to lay down on the ground beside my car and take a nap to sleep it off. Apparently a cop making the rounds came over and woke me up. He asked if I was ok and I replied yes, just too drunk to drive so I rather sleep. He asked me if I needed to go to the hospital. I asked him if they have water at the hospital. After he assured me there was water at the hospital, I demanded that I needed to be taken to the hospital so he called me an ambulance.
Upon leaving the hospital I heard a familiar voice freaking out just as I had earlier. I peaked in the room and saw that it was my friend asking what the heck happened to him. The nurse asked if we knew each other, we said yes. She put her hand over her head and said: same story, except this guy wanted to know if hospitals had beds.
Four Loko is a timemachine... that only goes to the future.
One night I chugged 1 1/2 FourLokos. I woke up at home like normal.
On my bank statement showed I went to 6 bars that night ten miles away.
I don't own a car.
drank 2 four loko's. woke up in the bathroom, went back to sleep, woke up on a couch, heard people screaming, woke up again i was in my friend's closet, police were searching the house, all my friends were in handcuffs, and the police never found me. now all of my friends have a nice little court date i don't have to attend.
Had two four lokos... apparently took some molly at a Deadmau5 and proceeded to blacked out. Woke up in some girls bed an hour away from my house. My boyfriend said I broke up with him for her after we had a threesome.
Did a four loko power hour which amounted to about 3 in 50 mins went out to the back porch of my fraternity to smoke some hookah, the next thing I remember is waking up in my 9:30 am class with one shoe taking rather illegible notes. I hadn't been to this class in over 2 weeks my blackout self apparently is an academic.
On my birthday, my roommates and I got a bunch of fourlokos to take home after a night out.
The memories I have of that night are only in pictures, and they are as follows:
-The 5 of us congregated around a huge bowl filled with FourLoko drinking from extra-long "I drink your milkshake" straws. I don't know where we got those. Or even where to get them now.
-Two girls attempting to throw baby carrots into each other's mouths. There are over 30 photos of this.
-Multiple shots of different girls on chairs trying to fan the smoke detector presumably from mass amounts of weed smoke and from all the burning food we attempted to cook that night. There were 5 different unidentifiable dishes leftover in the morning, most of them charred. I am hoping none of us ate any of it.
-Multiple people in, on, or under the toilet for one reason or another.
-Dancing with the maintenance guy, who probably came up to turn off the smoke alarm.
-A 6 person bubble bath that we tried without bubble bath.
(All of the dish soap was gone in the morning.)
-The attempt we made at rolling fourloko cans in one girl's hair like in that Lady Gaga video. 2 of them got stuck.
-Each of us trying to get the cans out of her hair. (I think we gave up because she woke up with one still tangled up in there.)
-Apparently, peanut butter facials.
-Lots and lots of vomit.
-No one had any pants on in any of the photos. Not a single one. Even people that appeared to have come in later to join us also had their pants off.
-Also, almost all of the photos were seemingly taken from the floor.
Had 2 four lokos and 8 shots...went up stairs puked in the girl's room sink then lie down on her bed...girl comes in the room and starts hooking up with me and doesnt notice that i had puked in her sink. My frined comes in the room doesnt notice me hooking up with her and goes in the bathroom i puked in and throws up everywhere in it. Both throw ups in her bathroom were blamed on him and the girl never knew i threw up. i love four loko
Had four cans of loko and offered a 5 year extension to Donovan McNabb. Thanks Loko.
Are you looking for free samples
: Back in the day when Loko had caffiene I could drink one of those and even though I was drunk I could study all night long. When they took out da caffiene I started popping addies all the time to stay focused even though I didn't have a prescription. Then I found this "ADDTabz
" that I can just order online without a prescription.
Loco por vida
After hearing all the hub-bub about this "blackout in a can" I felt compelled to try this stuff out. I went and bought four of the grape flavor. Looked innocent enough..but that first drink..OMFG..It was like drinking gamma rays laced with cough syrup. Just awful. Being the true drunkard I am I proceeded to drink 3 of them. Feeling the rush of energy coursing through my body I got antsy,and jumpy. Finished the last one & then went to a bar with friends..when I showed up The people around me kept asking me for coke...I was that jacked. A few pitchers/shots and a few poorly done karaoke songs later..I woke up in bed with a bunch of cuts on both hands, my face covered in blood/vomit and fully dressed. My phone was going craaaazy. My head felt like it was split with a dull tomahawk..I try to leave to get something to eat and my car is not there. Great..maybe I will check my phone now. Several angry text/voice messages later and I come to find out I didnt quietly leave the bar after singing two karaoke songs..Thats just when I blacked out. From second hand stories I guess i was heckling some other karaoke singers when some guy tried to start a fight with me...I guess I punched him out, spit on his girlfriend..threw a few bar stools..started fighting the bouncers..getting thrown outside in the parking lot onto my face and proceeded to try to punch out car windows whilst leaving the parking lot. Got into my car and terrorized my poor passenger for 13 city blocks, driving on curbs and throwing up in his lap..I then forgot the gate code to my apartment complex so I left my car at the front gate, lights on, blocking the gate. 8 stitches in my head, cast on right hand..bar might be pressing charges and I may be getting evicted. But hey no DUI. Four Loko is no effing joke.
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